Norm Setting:

Simply put, our words matter.  Whenever we are talking about race and racism, it is important to set norms, rules of thumb that will help balance power in a space. In challenging conversations, we must be willing to hold people accountable to their words in order to take our level of understanding of racial justice to a deeper level. Often, spaces that speak to social realities are safe spaces, we ask you to be brave. The goal is not to keep everyone “safe”, but to speak to lived realities and listen more deeply to gain better understanding. Remember that this is emotional labor. 

Acknowledge that we understand: 

• Let’s acknowledge that each of us is viewing our reality through a lens built through years of lessons taught and learned, the people we encounter, and our lived experiences.

• We each enter this space with biases and while we will be entering into some robust discussions, we will not have enough time to discuss everything, but do hope that today will begin a dialogue that is continued in our community.

• Each of us has volunteered to be here and is coming from a place of Goodwill.

• It is our hope to create a climate that is honest and open.

• When it comes to language around diversity, equity, access, identity, we make mistakes. But we vow to keep learning. 

Some suggested norms for you space: 

• Controversy with Kinship

  • It is okay to not agree completely. Controversy allows us to grow, but be sure to hold others in kinship, in a loving way. 

• What is shared stays here. What is learned goes out!

• Owning intentions v. impacts

  • It was hopefully not your intention to say something that deeply hurt someone, but remember that your words have greater impact. 

• Respect

  • Conversations around dismantling systems of oppression do not work if we do not respect the voices and lived experiences in the room. 

• One diva, one mic

  • Especially when people are speaking, we need to actively listen to one voice at a time. 

• Step up, step back

  • If you are a person who generally takes up a lot of space talking, this is your invitation to step back. If you are a person who generally does not say much, this is your invitation to take a chance on the conversation. Be sure to check in to see how much space you take up. Is everyone’s voice equally heard?

• Assume best intentions

  • Remember, we all come from different lived experiences but are all coming from a place of Goodwill. 

• Call in, not out; No attacks

  • We come together as Jesuit apostolates to bring racial justice to our institutions. In a shared vision for a hope-filled future, our goal is to bring people into our conversations. 

• Affirmations

  • Give kudos when kudos are due!

• Oops & ouch

  • Acknowledge mistakes and when you have been hurt by someone’s words. 

• Active Listening

  • Listening to understand not to respond

• Leave hierarchy at the door

  • We are all, always learners. Degrees, job titles, and salaries does not make any one person the ultimate expert. Convening in circles helps- shared perspective, gain collective wisdom and creates the space for everyone to be seen. 

• “I” statements

  • Focus on how something that was said affected you, what you learned. 

• Notice & name group dynamics in the moment

  • Name if a group is tense or curious. Name if there are voices missing in conversations. Name power dynamics in the space. 

• Defer to lived experiences

  • You may have read an article about racial justice, but listening to someone’s story is what the work of racial justice must be grounded in.